Aside

I am trying

Hi,

 

I managed to fail yet another interview……….but yes I am happy…… at-least I made a move…………lets see where I end up………..

anyhow………I really appreciate all the love and support I am getting from you all………….love you……….keep on motivating me………..you all are like my fuel………….

things that i have predicted in my older posts are turning out to be true now…………..and yes people in office did missed me…………..that includes my friends and others………….

the manager is so cheap that he did not provided me pick up and drop from office……….on the last working days…………the shift timings were odd……….it used to begin at 1430 hours and end at 0000………and at 0000 getting a auto or taxi is very difficult……….I was almost stuck on 08/05/2014 in the office………….

I wish someday that son of a bitch would get what he deserves………… karma will take its toll……

I wanted to forgive and forget………..but this did it…………..anyhow…………now I would have TIME……….I would be able to sketch and write…………and maybe paint………..and obviously study…………live a normal routine for some time………..meet people………..and read…

there is a load of books that is accumulating dust………..and some pdf’s that are loosing their binary code…………I will release their pain of being idle……….

I am still dealing with the same old question that is how to understand a woman………they like you……..dress up for you………like talking to you………but still they ignore you……..what does this mean……..

If you like someone……..you do what you have to do……….to spend time and be with them……….where will this ignoring part be useful……….

as I wrote in my earlier posts……….it takes time to forget…….time is the ultimate medicine……..

there is still a lot to do………..and there is so less done……..every-time I study I realize……..how less I know……….

I am getting sleepless nights now a days………I guess my energy is not utilized fully………I will include some workout too in my daily routine……..after switching to glutton free diet…….I already feel more active…….

 

supernova

Hi,

 

Today is a good day……….good day because………..I feel lucky………..lucky because i got friends that do care……………friends who think about me…………..friends who would be there for me…………..friends who are genuinely concerned in this selfish world…………….we all come across many many people in our lifetime……………some stay for a while…………some don’t……….and some are god sent to teach us lessons of a lifetime…………….from the time I have resigned from this company…………….my friends have been there with me………….they never left me alone…………..they kept on pushing me when i was low…………and today i felt how wonderful they are……………i was not willing to go for interviews………..I was reluctant……….I thought that if I quit my job I would be able to devote more time to my classes………….but since the last month the fact has been dawning on me that………..without money that was coming in…………it would become harder for me………..money is required everywhere………….and I would have to ask for money from my mam and dad………….I dislike that………..so the thing is they kept on pushing me………..nagging me………….and finally today I went for interviews……………I somehow managed to fail in one……………and the final round of another is on Monday………..let’s see how that goes…………till then there are two days in between………..I am in a much better mental state now due to them…………but trust me if I would tell this to all of them on their face……….they would say stop this drama…………and then there would be back to back gag shot on me…………..so never mind…………they will eventually stumble upon here……………anyhow……..life is almost normal again………..health is improving………….I am about to come out of a shit hole office…………but the thing is that my manager and his pets never miss an opportunity to give me hell…………which eventually falls on them…………….they keep on threatening me with termination……………..now how would you feel when you are not left alone in a place which you desperately want to leave……………I go to that place…………….I do my work…………I keep myself occupied………….my manager has a problem with me for reading a novel………….I wonder sometimes how much more will they fall down to show their influence and authority………….this place has really taught me a lot…………it really broadened my mind to a level that would not have been possible anywhere else…………..I feel like neo of matrix…………..who has learned ju-jitsu by plugging himself into the matrix………….

 

I have been having this dream again and again nowadays…………I am in a temple………….a huge space………….wearing a saffron colored dhoti…………the old wooden sandals………known as “Khaadeu”…………..and I am playing this big “Damru”………….holding it by both my hands…………

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maybe it is because i am reading “The immortals of Meluha”………………but this book has no such place mentioned…………….and I have once played that bid damru in reality as well…………….it was at “Neelkanth”…………….I was there with my family……….I did the “Abhishek” of Lord Shiva in the auspicious temple itself…………..a person rarely gets a chance to do that……….if you don’t believe me……..try visiting……….but the thing is that this dream is replaying itself………..maybe it is like a signal……..but what does it signifies i am unable to get that as of now………I am not a very religious person………….I believe that religions are like clothes…………..we have to choose what suits us the best………….you choose one that is very tight and you are stuck…………..you choose one that is too loose………….you have to put extra efforts to make it stay……………I only think that better time is ahead………..and a better me to live that………with the friends that I have earned……….so I will make it large………..rest is in the hands of god……….