Aside

happy ever after

Hi,

hope you all read this in good health…..and keeping well…..

things are seem to be working out for me now a days……

got a job….got someone that makes me happy…..a loving family……awesome friends……

I got up today early……actually I was not able to sleep………

had a nightmare……it made me think…….

I have never had things working out for me like this before…….and it is making me insecure…..

there are times when we feel insecure…….we don’t want to lose anything…..

there are times…..good times and the bad times…..

the unchanging truth and the best part of good or bad time is that it changes……

we don’t know exactly when and how it will change…..but it will change for sure….

and when it changes…..we don’t want to regret anything…..

anything that we have done in good times maybe knowingly or unknowingly…..that might have hurt others……

death is the only reality……and it is certain for sure…..

it takes a moment to ruin everything……and a lifetime to rebuild…..

we would never want that moment to come…..and that’s what I fear now…..and I want to get over with this feeling…..

we all go through so much during our lifetimes……that during good times……we are afraid of our happiness….

as these are the times we make mistakes……that leave a misery and regret behind…..

well I think it would not be the situation if we just keep on doing things as if it were the last day……that we might not ever see a tomorrow…..

we would definitely think multiple times before we hurt someone…..as we would not want to be remembered as someone who said or did wrong….

the point is how to be happy all the time……how to get over with this feeling……

how to be carefree……and alive……

there must be some way to shut these feelings and emotions that might come in the way of happiness…..

as happiness fetches more happiness……

how to be happy ever after……

 

 

 

 

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Aside

countdown till touchdown

Hi,

On Monday I went for interview………..did not made it through this time as well…………..and i am back………..I sent an email to the consultancy that scheduled the interview…………..lets see if they have more options……………..I learn from mistakes…………so i will perform with improvement next time…………well that’s about interviews……….my stupid manager marked me a warning email………..I don’t know what he wants to prove to me……….or to team members……….I have only about a week left in the company…………time to move on is here………..its like throwing stones on people passing by…………I don’t like it that I am writing less now a days…………with all the support you all have showed……..I really want to write daily………….lets see where life takes us………….once the notice period would be over I would be able to live a normal life for some time…………I would sleep in the night…………I would work in the day……….I would eat breakfast…….lunch and dinner……….I hardly remember the last time I had lunch…………..I eat in the evening……..after a light breakfast………….I would go for walks in the evening………..It has been a very long time………..that I went for a walk in the evening………….and I would volunteer for community service………if I got a chance………….I don’t think it would make any difference in anyone’s life after leaving this company………….It would be a great relief for me………..as I would not see the faces that I dislike………or want to forget………….I guess………life would be getting better after this………..I have learnt from experience that we don’t always make right decisions…………..as a matter of fact nothing is right or wrong…………everything is relative………..a decision that feels wrong today might make you feel like the best decision you have made in a lifetime………and sometimes a good decision might seem to fail………..its all about how you cope up with it………..like an Intelligent man once said……….If you think you are going through HELL………keep going…………he is correct in the sense that if you stop……….if you loose the will to keep on moving………you would be stuck in hell………..till you get a grip………..keep on moving………..it does not take long jumps……..or fast strides………but just firm small steps………..consistent…………. perseverance is the word…………..persistence…………..passion………….In the end what really would matter is………how satisfied you lived……….how happy were you throughout your lifetime………….after death no one can take his/her bank-balance or property along……….these things are materials that can play a part in a persons happiness………..but they are never a guarantee for happiness……….contentment occurs from inside……..

Finally

Hi,

I am thinking about going some place today…………my friend Abhishek is getting married……….he is planning his honeymoon in Mauritius……..and I am jealous……..I told him that too………and he was laughing……….well……..what to do……….he will enjoy…….I will enjoy here till the time I don’t earn enough……….I have filled resignation from this organization……….but, at present I don’t have any offer letter in hand as well…………and they are saying that my salary would be blocked and I will get that in my Full and Final pay cheque………..and there is construction going on at my house…………I need to pay the contractor money………….then there are other bills…………and I am going haywire thinking about the money…………..how is the question………….well I guess the payments would be delayed…………and I don’t like doing that at all…………..anyhow………….had a good time during Holi………..IMG-20140318-WA0000

IMG-20140318-WA0001

 

didn’t play Holi the whole day………..then went office in the evening……….manager ducked out when we all approached him for organizing a small celebration for the team……….so ultimately we all ordered pizza and pasta……….had pizza………then played a little Holi in the office……….Abhishek is the guy on the left to me………..on the right is Bad-Ass Vasutosh……..he is like a younger brother……….and he likes my company………..and he trusts me I think………so that was my day………..how was yours?

Truth and Fiction

Hi,

I have realized that growth is not instantaneous, neither is perfection attained in a jiffy….so I got to plan and then take small steps…….baby steps……..but consistency is required………..and these steps would refine me…….day by day…..refine everything I do…….I want to be rich enough……….that before buying anything that I like………I don’t need to think about paying for it……..I would just have to point my finger……..and the thing would be mine………..but yes, I know for that I need to do things that I have not done before……….I have to work hard, smart, and consistency would be the key………let’s see how far I reach…….I am now feeling well……emotionally…….on Friday…..when we were having a blast in the office………Upasana was sitting on the floor……..and let me tell you she turned out to be a bitch………I respect women……..but this tag is justified for her………..after joining this company……..she broke up with her boyfriend……….was spending time with an Idiot…………maybe fucking around…….who knows……..I was devastated thinking about her……..now she has broke up with that guy……..and on Friday……though we are not talking…….handed me her cell phone to take a picture of her……..with friends……..and boom……..the phone rang………and it was her old boyfriend………….calling her at 6 in the morning……….what does that mean………”She’s a gold digging bitch”……she hooks up with rich assholes……….a person from a not very wealthy family would not suffice her………so I felt a sudden relief in my heart and my mind………and yes both look pathetic……..;)………..god has blessed me much more then the Idiots she is with………..riches would come with time…….no regrets………I will earn………and be self made………rather than a person………who took money from parents to live and succeed in life……..anyhow…….I am happy today………having a good time………listening to a classic………”Pukarta Chala HU Main”…….here are the lyrics………

(Pukarta chala hu mai
 Gali gali bahar ki
 Bas ek chhaanw zulf ki
 Bas ek nigaah pyaar ki) - (2)
 Pukarta chala hu mai

 Ye dillagi ye shokhiya salam ki
 Yahi to baat ho rahi hai kaam ki
 Koi to mood ke dekh lega is taraf
 Koi nazar to hogi mere naam ki
 Pukarta chala hu mai
 Gali gali bahar ki
 Bas ek chhanw zulf ki
 Bas ek nigah pyaar ki
 Pukarta chala hu mai

 Suni meri sada to kis yakin se
 Ghata utar ke aa gayi zameen pe
 Rahi yahi lagan to ai dil-e-jawa
 Asar bhi ho rahega ek haseen pe
 Pukarta chala hu mai
 Gali gali bahar ki
 Bas ek chhanw zulf ki
 Bas ek nigah pyaar ki
 Pukarta chala hu mai 

;)........keep humming...........enjoy!

Happiness…

Image

 

I have been listening to the song Krewella- human on repeat…….I have now left everything in the hands of god……..lets see where he takes me……….I have worried a lot…..had sleepless nights……….had feelings of not being worth anything……….felt low and depressed…..but now I want to move on…….move on solid…….grow as a person…….as a human being……..take finances and career in consideration………work on them and grow……lets see what he has in store for me…….I want to fall in love again…….fall to rise…..rise in my own eyes…….have been surrounded by mean and ungrateful people……..but lets see where life takes me…….past would haunt me for sure……..but I want to look at it in the eyes and look at it till it looks down……….this week would be a little busy……..have a lot of webinars to attend……..want to work on the ideas that have been in my mind for a while now……..and yes here are the lyrics and video of that song……..love the song hope you like it too…..and maybe like me too.

 

 

Is anybody there, 
Does anybody care 
What I’m feeling? 
I wanna disappear so nobody can hear me when I’m screamin’ 
Cus I could use a hand sometimes 
Yeah I could use a hand sometimes 
They say pain is an illusion 
This is just a bruise and 
You are just confused but 
I am only human 
I could use a hand sometimes 
I am only human (3x) 

The night is bitter cold 
I wonder if you know 
That I’m sleepless 
Waitin’ like a ghost 
When I need you the most 
That go unnoticed 
Cus I could use a hand sometimes 
Yeah I could use a hand sometimes 
They say pain is an illusion 
This is just a bruise and 
You are just confused but 
I am only human 
I could use a hand sometimes 
I am only human (2x) 

The weight of the world is pullin’ me down 
(Where are you now, where are you now) 
Every breathe feels like I’m gonna drown 
(Where are you now, where are you now) 
I’m the only one left to hold on oh 
Singin’ this song but can’t find the words 
Cus I could use a hand sometimes 
Yeah I could use a hand sometimes 
They say pain is an illusion 
This is just a bruise and 
You are just confused but 
I am only human