lots going on my mind

hmm………..a lot is going on my mind………various things that I have to focus on right now include…..CAREER, finances, spiritual peace or solace, physical fitness……I feel this energy trapped inside me all the time………but I am unable to utilize it to the fullest…….somewhere above the stomach……and yes a girlfriend is on my mind as well………..but with the lessons from past I am kind of………afraid……..another girl dumped because she made me feel sort of ignored……..gut feeling…….most of the times its right……I mean its always right…….never felt a chance in life when it went wrong………..but some part of me still wants to talk to her……..its been like 3 days…….no text, no phone call, no nothing……….the only thing I could make out of this is that she was least concerned about me……..I mean she is least concerned about me……but never mind………I am strong enough to survive……..these emotions were drained……..don’t know where are they coming back from……..yup I feel lonely…….I want someone to be with…….but Aghhhh………its complicated…………I love this girl but she does not love me…….or maybe she does……….as she sometimes flirted……..rarely……..god dammit……….cant she just say whether she loves me or not…………….I will go paranoid………I think I need mental peace as the top priority………..only god could help………