Aside

attention is the killer

Hi,

How have you all been……..hope you all are doing well………

I got a new job offer finally………and the work location would be nearby my home too……

and it would be nearby my old office as well……..so that I sometimes might visit my friends……or sometimes they might come over…….

the classes are going well…….and I am again legging behind………hope to catch up over the weekend…….

today I was thinking about the attention a person should be awarded……..I was thinking about……..how to decide the quantum of attention that a particular person deserves……..

because if we give someone more attention then they deserve………things don’t end up well……..and if the attention is too less…….again things can go bad…….

so coming back to this very word……”ATTENTION”…….as far as I know…….there can be a time constraint that we could put on this……..

but then again……..situations and scenarios would very drastically………attention given at an optimal time works best……….a little lag…….and the things may turn out differently….

like a spouse cooks dinner for his/her beloved……..and at the dinner table asks him/her……..how was the food……….

now they are obviously seeking attention at that very instance………trust me say something good at that precise moment…….and have a great time ahead……

miss that moment……..miss an opportunity……..

and again……give too much attention at that moment……….and the moment would be blown…….

so how can we decide……..”how much”……….of this word is required………

we all must have gone through situations……..situations that didn’t worked well…………

or situations that went miraculously well……..just because the perfect amount was delivered…..

a perfect amount of this word……..to the recipient……..at the precise moment……

so the perfect algorithm if I may say……would be having factors……..”how much” and “when”……..as far as I could think of…..

if you were able to figure this out…….please share your experiences……….It might help a lot of people…….Including me…….

and yes the after effects…….it would be great how to deal with them as well……..

like if we have done something stupid enough to screw up a situation by over or under utilization of attention…….how can we bounce back on the track and make amends………

I wish there were a manual for life…….

but I think together we could figure this out…….can’t we…….

 

 

 

 

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10 thoughts on “attention is the killer

  1. Hi! Such a thoughtful question. And this a long answer haha: I can say that it’s a fine balance. I think generally people want to be recognized and appreciated for their effort, every now and then. Now, it’s hard to see effort as it’s abstract sometimes but you can see it in actions. Words can tell a story, but actions reveal those words. For instance, let’s look at your example of a woman cooking dinner. Here is what she is thinking sometimes: she is wondering if you like it (because she wants you to like what she made) and she’ll ask. But she won’t have to ask if you compliment/comment on it somehow. I know that is very confusing and men aren’t mind readers! But a simple thank you or comment goes a long way. I hope this makes sense! Thanks for sharing your post. Very interesting discussion you opened up.

    Like

    • Hey Allison W., its awesome to see your

      comment….

      glad you found the discussion very interesting…….

      you have took the pain to go through my

      scribble…….

      as you said quite correctly that everyone wants to be

      recognized for their effort…..

      and once again I would say that men try their best

      but speaking out by their counterpart really helps……

      though women I think mostly shy away from this……

      and yes a simple thank you and comment goes

      way….

      but I would really like to figure out as to how much

      would suffice in a situation….

      and what if that small thank-you….though sincere

      might be taken as sarcasm….

      I have seen that in action 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      • Haha. That’s funny. Sarcasm can be a relief. It can defuse things 🙂 and just as men should give attention to women, women should also do the same for men. To me, if someone is going through effort, you should be thankful for it and not expect it. Being appreciative goes a long way. I think the healthiest relationships make this the foundation.

        Like

      • yup it is… It can defuse as well as fire up things… 🙂

        exactly if someone is putting effort.. he or she

        definitely deserves to be appreciated….

        and yup being appreciative goes a long way….

        thanks for this beautiful comment… Allison W.

        really appreciate your efforts!

        Like

  2. Hello there.. Always great to catch up on your life expressions… I live as if …what I say is a mirror of Who I am “being”…which may or may not upset someone.. Being yourself is the key always..You see I believe that the more I am unconditional with myself.. The more I pass that to another.. If I felt I was looking to someone else to please me ..by their attention or felt they had to have a certain response from me… This would create the frequency of the relationship to have conditions..which is a set up for disaster…we attract what we are here to attract to or repel from.. Awareness of kindness and gratitude in oneself allays helps !! Heart to heart Robyn

    Like

    • First of all Robyn I missed you….

      its always a warm feeling when you stop by….

      great thought…..live as if a mirror of who we are

      “being”…

      being unconditional with oneself brings inner

      peace….

      and yes that’s exactly the type of relationship I am

      afraid of…..the one bound to be a disaster….

      and after reading your comment I feel…..attention is

      temporary….gratitude stays a lifetime….

      Heart to Heart…..

      Like

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